Sunday 27thth June 2021: Diary, graphics, photographicalisations, and the odd ode.

♥ TFZers - In Training? ♥

♥ HRH Lisa & Bill at Harrods ♥

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Sunday 27th June 2021

Woke to Thought-Storms

05:00hrs: The thought storms were raging, so many little and large worries and concerns milling about at the same time.

The fridge leak, will Little Inchies fungal lesion be bleeding? Will the carer be late, should I have a shave and do the teeth before they arrive, and have a shower afterwards? Will Saccades Sandra be kind to me today? These and other frettings rampaged on for a few minutes and were then reduced to a lower urgency level when the Porcelain Throne needed urgent attention - a semi-panic to get to the wet room in time began...

I fumbled to get my grotesquely stomached body out of the £300, second-hand, c1968, horrendously grungy coloured, eyesore of a haemorrhoid-testing, rickety, unfit-for-use, recliner, in a desperate effort to get to the closet in time! Oh, dearie me! I genuinely believed I was not going to make it!

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Porcelain Throne Session.

Boy, what a Kerfuffle.

I hobbled, limped and rushed to the throne, and plonked my mass of a body down on the seat. Then I waited for the wind to escape of its own accord and waited for the motion to start!

It took a while, but the rumbling from the innards assured me that the process was being activated, as the various aches and pains indicated. This gave me time to inspect the injuries I'd gained in the frenzying rush, to get seated in time. (And then wait for ten minutes for something to happen?)  

A few seconds of sharp pain as the motion finally began... then a smooth mega-long flowing of the over a foot long evacuation product, and oddly, as it finished, a wee-wee, also of marathon proportions, flowed! I've never known a wee to last so long. And there was over a minute of PMAD (Post-Micturition-After Dribbling). Tsk!

Surprisingly, one flush cleared the lot away. But there was some bleeding from Harold's Haemorrhoids, I assume. 

I envisaged the snotty, Gastroenterologist at the next appointment saying: "I told you to drink only decaffeinated tea!" Hehe!

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Health Checks Completed

A shame, but the blood pressure had shot up again this morning, and the Urine Health was up to number five level. Hey-Ho!

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A Brew and Photo of the View

The Glengettie was delightful to drink, but the view was a bit dour today?

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Part-Ablutioning Done

I decided to get the teeth cleaned and a good shave and check the bruises and blotches scattered around my Billy Bunter body.

Well, those I could get to see, anyway. Haha!

The teeth cleaning is getting a little painful. The shaving, without too many dropsies for once... I joke not! A good few cuts and nicks, mind you. That will be because I didn't have a shave yesterday; I'm sorry I didn't now.

I had a look around at the known bruises.

Yesterday's colourful bruise acquired in the tumble had already gone down a lot, almost gone in fact. Both of the ones on the arms were virtually gone now. However, the one on the shoulder that the Carer mentioned yesterday, from several days ago when I walked into the doorframe, is lingering on and has turned a little yellow around the edges. So I'll have to come up with a name for my bruise checking? Bruisession Session? No, perhaps not a good one, that! Belinda Bruising... no, Brutal Brutus's Bruising... Maybe not, though.

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Got the Spuds in the Crockpot

Hardly newsworthy, you might think?

But the series of Whoopsiedangleplop while doing this simple task of preparing Josies Chilli-Braised Beef stew for her regular Sunday lunch, I'll mention:

1) Wiping the lid and porcelain bowl - I dropped the lid - it bounced on the floor, up glancing the knee, and landed atop of my big toe.

2) Taking extra care with the heavy basin did not help - other dropsies, and I pushed my bulbous belly forward to trap the container against the sink. But I trapped, caught it with my redundant lower equipment, and started Little Inchies fungal lesion bleeding!

3) Medicated 'things' very carefully. Then, back into the kitchen... cleverly walking right into the wet room doorframe again!

Oh, dearie me! The pot's cap came off as I was shaking some sea salt into the water in the dish; all of the salt that was left in the packet shot out! (It was about half full, but is no longer!) I kept calmish! 4) Got the spuds into the slow cooker, carefully filled it with water, added a bit of salt...

However... putting the small pot of onion salt back in the cupboard above the crockpot... Yes, you've probably guessed it... It dropped from my grip, and it splashed down again, right into the crockpot! Grungleknacks! 5) Cleared the water, dried the bowl and got it right this time, carefully using the onion salt. I removed the Saxa pot and threw it away. Cleaned up the mess. And had a couple of minutes in a mellow, pissed-off, sulking mode!

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Started This Blog Off.

07:35hrs, No carer yet. So I made a start on this post. Saccades Sandra was not too bad... I shouldn't have said that, should I? Pressed on with this blogger blogging.

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The Morning Carer Arrived

08:30hrs; The same carer as yesterday arrived (Ilia, I think). Today, he was more confident, getting used to my stuttering and wobbling on his first call yesterday. 

This time he told me when something (Medications) had run out in the bag. The Bisoprolol Fumarate (Beta Blockers) had run out. Which confuses me a little. I'm sure I was told not to go into any medications at all. This will be handled for you by Meridian. But it isn't? Ah, well, I might have misunderstood. So I fetched some from the new prescription pack.

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Part-Prepped Josie's Nosh 

Then got the Shower taken.

Prepped Josies Cooking as far as I could. Updated this blog, then got the Showering and medicationalisationing sorted out.

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Showered!

The plates looked decent enough.

Well, I say fine... not bad at all!

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Back to getting Josies Nosh Sorted.

Bit of a job getting the timing right, with so many things needing different cooking lengths. All done and delivered dead on time for the gal. She seemed a little more responsive today, wanted to know what this and that was on the tray, bless her.

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Got My Meal Served Up

A reet-meaty-treat

I gobbled it all and got the washing up done. Then, settled in the recliner and managed to nod off for a couple of hours, at last!

Woke Up! 

Made a brew, then updated this blog. Then did a graphic for tomorrows Inchy Today...

Evening Carer Arrived

18:30hrs: Soon had me sorted out.

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Updated This Blog

Got it sent off to Blogger, but it was a bugger; the font formatting kept changing on its own accord again? Argh! Fonts, formatting, sizes...

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Hello, Porcelain Throne Needed!

Visit of the day number two. Similar to the earlier one. Resistant, slow, solid, painful - but this time, no bleeding with it. Once again, the one flush was all that was needed!

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Belated Thoughts of the Day - In Ode

Parts of this Sunday showed an ethereality,

My moods were of mixed duality,

At times, I was completely pain-free!

Occasionally, I sensed festivity,

Although these were in the exiguity,

Many events had forgettability,

My brain held confusion, a floatability,

Ofen I revealed my stupidity and gullibility,

Although there was less hostility,

I enjoyed the odd moment of geniality,

Then some of the lack of practicality,

Others, of hobbling immobility,

I had one flash, of impudicity,

It really was a terrible pity,

Thought Storms back, while writing this ditty

With their tormenting, immutability!

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Evening, all!